Here we go again

It's about to be the start of a new year and what better way to start it than with another remodel.  That's right, folks.  We are doing another room remodel.

This time our energy will be focused on our laundry room.  We bought a new front-load washing machine and dryer as our anniversary gift to one another and we thought it was a little crazy to put them in our laundry room when it was in such desperate need of a facelift.

Every house has that one room where junk is stored and where you just can't bring yourself to face.  That is our laundry room.  It is bad.  Real bad.  It looks a lot like what the rest of our house looked like before we started systematically remodeling room by room.  It's an embarrassment and you can see it through the glass door in the kitchen, so it is also a constant eyesore.

That ends tomorrow.  We are putting down new flooring, retexturing, painting, fixing the trim, and changing out lights.  Our hope is to be done in a week.  We have to be done in a week.  We have an infant that loves to spit up and I do laundry at least every other day, so I don't know if we can make it longer than a week.

Here is a glance at some before pictures so you can get a feel for how bad it is.

Old bifold doors and paneling 

The old washer and dryer

Awful threadbare carpet and trim

Perhaps the worst light fixture ever

The good news is this that this room and one other stand in between me and my goal of finishing all our  remodels before I turn 30.  Then we get to paint the outside.  It never ends.

two months

Beckett Oliver is two months old!  It is amazing to see how much he has changed over the past month. He is really starting to develop a personality and it is so fun!  We are constantly surprised by all the things he is learning and doing.  He is one strong baby!

We go to the doctor next week so we will find out how much he weighs and how long he is.  Last time he was in the 5th percentile for weight and head size but the 50th for length.  He has definitely grown. I will post what his new stats are as soon as we know.

Christmas at the Browns

It's Christmas Eve so I thought I would share some pictures of our decorations from this year.  I am a slow and steady type of gal when it comes to most things.  It took me about two weeks to get all of our decorations up and will probably take longer to take them down.  I also try to buy a few new decorations each year.  As much fun as Christmas decorations are, who wants to spend thousands of dollars on items you'll only have out for a month or so?  Not I.

I decided to display our Christmas cards in a new, Pinterest-inspired way this year.  I love getting Christmas cards and thankfully we get a lot.  I decided to hang ribbon and clothespin the cards to our kitchen cabinets.  I love how it turned out.  It's so fun to come into the kitchen and see all of our friends and family's faces!  After Christmas I plan on making a card album like I did with last year's cards.

Our new decoration for the kitchen was a Christmas-inspired floral arrangement that I commissioned.  Okay, I had it made but I have always wanted to commission something and it sounds fancier than saying I went to a local shop and had them throw it together. 

The family room is decorated the same as last year with garlands on the table and console.  I bought a painting of Santa Claus last year but I was never brave enough to face Hobby Lobby so it didn't get put out.  My goal for post-Christmas sale shopping is to find Christmas china.  I don't want anything too cute or too traditional so I have had a hard time.  Hopefully this year is the year that I succeed.

We decorated the living room a lot like last year as well.  The tree is different because I did it myself.  I am super proud of how it turned out.  It was my first year decorating my tree on my own because my friend Jennifer had a newborn.  We added a driftwood nativity.  A good, traditional nativity is also on my wishlist.  I would love a hand-carved one.  Maybe a Christmas market cruise is in order?  A final idea I stole from Pinterest was doing initials instead of gift tags.  I love a monogram in any form so I liked bringing that into our decor.  

Our tree at night

So that is our home this year.  I am so excited to see how it evolves over the years.  I have a feeling that next year's decor will be much more child-friendly since Beckett should be up and moving.  

Merry Christmas Eve from the Browns!

Life in the NICU

Having a baby in the NICU is like joining a secret club.  I like to use the mob as an example.  Once you are in, you are in.  You have a bond with other parents who have had a baby in the NICU.  And while it is easy to get into the NICU, it is super hard to get out.

I ended my blog about Beckett's birth with his big debut.  At first it seemed like he was going to be fine.  He had a loud, strong cry but from the bed I could see that he wasn't pinking up like he needed to.  He also stopped crying and sounded like he was full of junk.

My doctor told me that he inhaled amniotic fluid during the delivery and my hope was that with some deep suctioning, he would be fine.  This wasn't the case.  The nursery nurse placed a oxygen saturation monitor on him and he was in the high 60s/low 70s.  It's time like these when you are both thankful for medical experience but wish you didn't know so much at the same time.

They brought him to the bed but I told the nurse that I would hold him for a second but that it was more important that they got him on oxygen.  I would have loved to have held him for hours, but I knew that we could be heading down the wrong path.

The nursery nurse and Daniel headed to the nursery and I got left behind.  I am not sure how Daniel held it together in the nursery, because I know that I would have been a mess.  They placed the baby under an oxygen hood but quickly realized that he needed more care than the nursery could provide and would have to be admitted to the NICU.

Under the oxygen hood before getting moved

We had to wait a few hours before we were allowed to go visit him.  Our room was the farthest room from the NICU and it felt like four miles after having a baby.  When we got the NICU, we spoke to his neonatologist.  All of the neonatologists were nice, but Dr. Haider was our favorite.  He explained that Beckett's lungs were full of fluid and his blood gases were not looking great.  He had to be placed on high-flow oxygen and antibiotics.

Beckett in the NICU

The nurses were amazing.  They answered all of our questions and even let me look through his chart and see his lab results.  They told us that there are certain tests that he would have to pass before we would be able to take him home.  They included being maintaining his temperature in an open crib, getting off oxygen, and having normal lab results.  We were far from this point.

It wasn't until the next evening that he was stable enough for us to hold him.  He had a few bad blood gases during the night, but had improved during the day.  It was so hard to know that he was there in the same hospital as us, but not to be able to hold him so we are so excited when we finally were able to.  

Daniel and Beckett

Finally getting to hold Beckett after 36 long weeks

My sister and Beckett (note the IV in my child's head)

The nurse told us that if Beckett continued to improve we would be able to begin bottle feedings.  We did not realize at the time, but bottle feedings would soon be all we talked about.  Before being discharged, Beckett would have to go 24 hours without being tube fed.  His oxygen was also slowly being titrated and he was getting feisty.  They had to restart his IV three times before they decided to move it to his head.  That is something no mother wants to see, but I knew that it didn't hurt and was better than him continuing to be stuck by needles.

The next few days had ups and downs.  He did well enough with his tube feedings to be moved to bottle feedings.  At first his bottle feedings went really well, but eventually he started falling asleep during feedings and was too tired to take them in the amount of time he was given.  The respiratory therapists continued to titrate his oxygen but decided to start him on breathing treatments and percussion therapy due to bad chest X-rays.  He had been able to maintain his temperature and was moved to an isolette, as well.

Getting to wear clothes for the first time

The precious sign his nurse made for him

That is pretty much how his stay progressed.  He had good moments and bad.  His bilirubin levels increased, but not enough to need to be placed under a light.  He did really well breastfeeding, but was still having a hard time bottle feeding and most feedings ended with him having to be tube fed.  Plus, the amount he was required to eat kept going up every day, so we felt like we couldn't win.  He was sating well on room air but had to have it at a flow of 4 liters per minute or he would desat to unacceptable levels.  It was a mixed bag.

Thank God for his nurses (except for the one that tube fed him 3ml and bought us another 24 hours in the NICU).  They were so helpful and knew how badly we want to go home.  One nurse suggested that I come up for all of his feedings for a day and breastfeed.  They can't measure breastmilk so this would help him meet the requirement of no tube feedings in 24 hours.  It worked and he was able to cross that task of his list.

Another nurse talked to the doctor and told him how often we were up there for his feedings.  Feedings were every three hours and we went to almost all of the ones during the day shift and at least one or two during the night shift.  She convinced the doctor that we shouldn't have to "room-in" or stay the night in a hospital room to prove we could take care of him.  That got us another step closer to leaving.  

After a lot of back and forth, Beckett was finally taken off oxygen and was able to maintain his oxygen saturation.  This meant that he could be moved to an open crib and was another step closer to discharge.

At this point we had been in the NICU for a week, but it felt more like months.  I have so much more empathy for parents who have children in the hospital for extended periods of time.  You deal with so many emotions.  I felt immense amounts of guilt if I missed a feeding, but I wasn't taking care of myself when I tried to go to every feeding.  All of this was after just one week. I can't imagine what it would have felt like to have him in the hospital for a month or more.  

I also learned how lucky we are to have friend and family in the town where the hospital was.  We pretty much moved in with my husband's brother and his wife and they were amazing hosts.  My best friend and her husband took me to lunch to give me a break, too.  We wouldn't have kept our sanity without them.

A picture of the costume Beckett's NICU nurses made for him

Finally on Halloween we were told that if Beckett's bilirubin level continued to decrease and if he made it through the night without any set-backs, we would be able to go home.  We completed a CPR course and filled out lots and lots of paperwork.  We had to schedule an appointment with an audiologist because Beckett failed his hearing test twice (he passed his test with his audiologist) and his two-week appointment with his pedicatrician.

The next morning we went for our morning visit and got the good news that we were being discharged.  The nurse had already fed him, so we were able to leave right then.  It was the best feeling ever.  We were so excited to get to finally take him home.

So that is an abridged version of our NICU stay.  While there were lots of bumps, there is silver lining to having a baby in the NICU.  They got him on a feeding schedule for us which pretty much echoed Baby Wise.  He also learned to self-soothe.  Finally, we were able to relax.  He had gone through a lot and so had we.  We learned that we weren't going to break him and got rid of a lot of fear that first-time parents have.

fill in the blank friday

It's the most exciting time of the year!  My mom is already in town and in two days my dad and sister will be here.  And it's only four days until Christmas!  I know Beckett will have no idea what is going on but I am SO looking forward to his first Christmas.  Blanks are from the little things we do.  

1.  Something I swore I'd never do, but have ended up doing anyway is    live in a small town (especially in the Panhandle region).  The funny thing is a lot of my friends have ended up moving back to Dalhart since I made the big move nearly five years ago and my best friend will soon be in that statistic come next month.  Yay!   .

2.  Something I've always wanted to do is  see the world and experience different cultures.  I am slowly working on this goal but I know I will never be able to completely cross it off my to-do list   .

3.  Something I have absolutely no desire to ever do is   jump out of or off of anything.  I have an extreme fear of heights and staring down death just doesn't appeal to me  .

4. The best thing I ever did was   move to a small town (see question #1).  Daniel is here to stay and I am so glad I could get over my phobia of small-town living.  It's not so bad, but if Daniel did ever want to move, I wouldn't be opposed  .

5. When it comes to trying new things, I am  hesitant.  I will try most things but there are some that I won't.  I don't really do spontaneous so there would have to be a fair amount of warning and planning.  I like to plan .

6. One thing I've never done is  break a bone.  The first time I was ever hospitalized over night was when I had Beckett and I had never been in the hospital as a patient until my gallbladder surgery.  I am hoping to make it to the finish line with no broken bones  .

7.  My favorite thing do do is  spend time with Daniel and Beckett.  They are my favorite people and I love watching them together.  Beckett has started smiling a lot this week and makes me so excited to watch him grow  .

Getting organized

Before Beckett arrived, I went on an organization kick.  If it didn't move, it was organized.  The nursery was obviously my main focus.  I thought that if I could get it organized exactly how I wanted, it would be a huge help once he was here.

Well, we are almost two months in and I am so thankful that I put so much time and effort into organizing Beckett's belongings.  Everything is still organized and it has made life much easier.

Here are some of the ways I organized, maybe you will get a few ideas that you can use in your home. (Side note:  I am painting two picture frames and then the nursery will be done.  I will hopefully post pictures next week.  Finally.)

Everything in the closet is either hanging or in fabric bins.  The hanging clothes are organized by size dividers.  The bins are all labeled with hanging tags that I made.  I even went as far as to make separate bins for each size category of clothing.  Is anyone else as excited about organization as I am?  Probably not.

Even his dividers are preppy

Fabric bins that hold all his stuff

The hanging tags

His changing table was inspired by Pinterest.  I bought a tiered basket and put everything he could possibly need when being changed.  The bottom tier has diapers, hand sanitizer, changing pad covers, and diaper cream.  The middle tier has clothes because he likes to surprise by peeing while being changed.  Not really the type of surprise that I want, but I get it every couple of days.  Finally, the top tier has toys because he is much better behaved when he is distracted.

Diaper change basket

My final nursery-related stroke of organizing genius was the medicine cabinet.  It may or may not have been Pinterest inspired as well.  I am obsessed with these Sterlite containers and have found hundreds of places to use them.  I organized all our medicine in six different categories and labeled them.

The medicine cabinet

A closer look

So that is a glimpse into my OCD.  It really has helped in the middle of the night when Beckett is screaming because he wants to eat.  Hopefully my next post will be the completed nursery.  I'm super proud of it and can't wait to share!

fill in the blank friday

It's Friday, which means I am hours away from the weekend, which means that Daniel will be home to help with the baby.  I have quickly realized that being a stay-at-home mom is a lot of work.  I am so thankful that I am able to stay at home but it is nice to have help in the evenings and on the weekends.  Plus, my mom will be back next week, so I will have help during the day.  Maybe I will be able to shower before 9pm.  That would be nice.

1.  When it comes to holiday shopping, I   do all of my shopping online, specifically at Amazon.  For the past two years, I have not bought a single gift in a store.  It is so much easier and I get two free-day shipping since I am Prime    .

2.  A few things on my Chritmas wish list are...  a baby food maker, a Le Creuset french oven, and season 3 of Downton Abbey     .

3.  An intangible gift I would like to receive is   a full night's sleep. That would be amaze-fest USA  .

4. A gift I would like to give this year is   to find the perfect gift for Daniel.  He is the hardest person to shop for.  No kidding, Today Show did a segment on technology-related gifts and he already owned every single item.  Maybe I'll just slap a bow on the baby and call it good  .

5. My Christmas will be spent  at our home with my family.  We are so excited that they are coming and even more excited to start some new traditions with Beckett. .

6. My most favorite Christmas gift of all time was  a Coach purse that my parents got me.  I wanted it so bad and I thought that there was no way I would ever get it.  It was the beginning of my love affair with handbags.  I also love my DSLR camera  .

7.  The best thing about the holidays is  the decorations and the general sense of goodwill among people .

Insta-update

We have a new nickname for Beckett. The Dictator. He calls the shots.

His newest passion is being held. He won't sleep unless he is being held. We let him "cry it out" for 30 minutes last night before I cracked.

It's hard to blog while holding a baby. Trust me, I'm doing it right now. So I thought I would share some of my recent Instagram photos.

Beckett had his first photo shoot

After two weeks of procrastinating, I decorated our tree

Beckett met Santa for the first time

And joined the Texas Tech legacy program.  Wreck 'em!

I mail merged, labeled, and mailed out birth announcements

And Beckett slept (while being held)

We're going on a trip

I have said it once and I will say it again, I love to travel.  It is probably one of my favorite things.  I love getting to see places I have never been and trying new foods.  I also love to learn, which makes me a little bit of a nerd.

I haven't had a trip to plan since we went to Savannah in July and I have been having withdrawals.  Daniel and I decided before the baby came that we were going on a five-year anniversary trip come hell or high water.  I love Beckett, but I know that I am much happier if I get to plan and go on at least one vacation a year and I am sure that he wants a happy mom.  Plus, my parents are dying to watch him and they live in a major hub city for a certain airline.  Everyone is happy happy happy.

So we finally sat down and decided where we will be going on our next big vacation.  I'll give you a couple hints.

Maybe you guessed or maybe you didn't.  Either way, we are going to Italy!  I am so excited.  We have both been to Italy once before but I was there for a day and Daniel went in December.  We are spending a week in Capri and the Amalfi coast.  I have always wanted to go to Southern Italy and I couldn't think of a better place to go for our anniversary.  Even though we won't be going for another nine months, I am already planning and booking hotels.  I really should have been a travel agent.